|Getting ogre-ified in Shrek: The Musical|
Funny enough, when I was unemployed for a few months, I was happy. The lack of income was disheartening, but I had a safety net, and the rest of my life was better: I had time to do things I really wanted to do because I wasn't working, I could go outside when the sun was up, cook without spending all of my free time doing it, and get some real cosplay work done.
When I eventually got a job, I wasn't entirely thrilled. Not only because of the sudden lack of free day time again, but because it was going "back" to a job I wasn't keen on doing again. While there were lots of things I loved about the job, on the whole, I was sad. I didn't really realize this fully, at least not all the time. But over the time I worked there and tried to figure out what I wanted to "do" as the next step in my career or as a new career, I fell into bad habits, I gained weight, and I didn't do things I normally enjoyed - like work on costumes.
When I did work on a costume, I tried it on after not having worked on it in a while and ripped a hole in it under the pressure of the new weight that I was still in denial about.
This made me not want to work on costumes. For a long time.
A loooong time.
I'm pleased to say that I'm somewhat settled into a somewhat new life now, and that I am generally happier and working on repairing my habits and my body and my outlook on life.
And now, I'm also trying to repair and renew my dedication to cosplay, and to accept my body for what it is right now and to build costumes around the way it is right now instead of waiting for some mystical future time when everything will be perfect because, well, it won't.
One of the things I'm going to try to do is update this blog again. I know I've never been consistent in the past, even the times I said I would be. It hasn't been my strong suit. I've been flakey about it.
My goal is going to be a post every week. At the minimum, a small post with three things in it. It might be three things I did, three things you should do, three things to make stuff with, three of any things! But it's a small format that isn't too overwhelming for me to begin this journey. If I can post more often than that, I will!
If you've made it through this post, and if you have enjoyed my blog in general, first of all, thank you! Second, please do leave comments! I like to know someone out there (even just one person) is enjoying some of the content, it gives me motivation to keep going!
I recently played princess Fiona in a local production of Shrek: The Musical, and she has a line where she says, "I'm just happy it's a new day, full of promise and fresh starts." I hope that it is indeed!